How to Start a Mindfulness Practice Now

Last weekend I was with my husband traveling to Portland. As the airplane was about to take off, I felt a moment of panic. I took a deep breath and grabbed my husband’s hand. I noticed the way it felt in mine, I noticed my feet on the floor and I noticed the sensation of the airplane’s wheels beneath us as they rolled and sped up. I looked out the window and noticed the buildings, the road, and the sky. I had a moment of pure noticing exactly what is, and realized that I was safe.

Mindfulness. 

I remember when I was first learning the tools and techniques for a more peaceful me, it felt foreign trying to explain to others what exactly it was—this thing called Mindfulness. Now, google the word and see how many articles and blogs pop up on it! 

This past week a client asked about it. “What’s that thing everyone is talking about? It’s like meditating. Do you think that will help me?” Oh, how mindfulness can and will help you, love.

Mindfulness is a form of meditation, and it’s my preferred way to get into the right headspace. Whether I’m feeling happy, sad, fearful, anxious, or simply going about my day doing ordinary, mundane things, it is the daily practice of presence that grounds me in my life. I know people who happily plop themselves pillows and meditate the good old way most of us probably envision, but the good news is that mindfulness can become a daily practice that is engrained in you as you go about your day, no pillow needed.

It all starts with noticing, with neutral awareness, what you are doing and when you are doing it as you hone in on your senses.

When you are walking outside on a crisp, fall day, you can notice the colorful leaves as they sway and veer slowly to the ground.

The next time you are putting lotion on your hands, notice how it gradually goes from cool to warm as you gently massage it into your skin.

When you are talking to a friend, be truly present in the conversation, noticing and hearing all that she is telling you.

As you are enjoying your morning coffee, pay attention to the warmth of the mug as you hold it in your hands and the way the coffee tastes as you drink it, sip by sip.

These moments are all just tiny examples of mindfulness meditation—a daily practice of intentional presence in your life.

The bonus for living a mindful life? Inner calm and peace, girlfriend. When you get in the habit of noticing, you are really flexing your mind muscle and staying in a place of constant gratitude for exactly what is in your life.

3 Affirmation Words That Changed My Life

Recently I posted one of my all time favorite quotes to Instagram, “You are enough.” With it being flooded all over social media, I knew I needed to explain more, as these 3 simple words have completely changed my life.
 
Several years ago, I was going through one of the hardest times of my life. I was in my mid-twenties and trying to figure it all out. In many ways, the girl who had come out of foster care, been in the most incredible long-term relationship, and landed her dream job as an elementary classroom teacher, had finally “made it.” I had achieved so much of what I had wanted for myself as a young girl. Yet, there was a part of me that was really scared. For so much of my life, I had a plan. I knew where I was going. I knew exactly what I wanted.

Now, here I was, an adult, with many of the things I had always wanted right in front of me, and somehow felt incomplete and less than.
 
As the feelings grew and intensified, thoughts of “you’re not enough” or anything else laced with pure judgment would sweep my mind whenever I didn’t do or say something the way my growing perfectionist had expected of me.  
 
Fortunately, there was also that loving and compassionate part of me who recognized that I did not deserve to treat myself, of all people, in such a way. Over time, with lots of support and help, I started to rewire my brain for positivity.
 
Part of that process involved mindfulness, where I learned how to be more in the moment and really listen to my thoughts. Whenever I would catch myself berating my actions or saying the most critical things, I developed a phrase to gently combat those thoughts.
 
You are enough.
 
The simple 3-word message is still on repeat, even today, whenever my perfectionist tries to   hold me to the highest standard. I gently tell her that it’s okay, that I’ve got this, and that I do not need her to take such tough care of me anymore. 
 
This, is an affirmation. This is my affirmation. Every day. 
 
Creating your own affirmation starts with listening to your thought reel. What’s going on in that mind of yours? Pay attention to your thoughts—the sneaky little critical voice that is really trying to keep you at your best so that you show up in the world as your most dazzling self. The thing is, by responding gently back to that critical voice, you will be showing her that you too, just like me, have got this, and that you do not need her to take such strong care of you. 
 
As you listen, you will hear the message loud and clear that is on repeat. You can then turn that nagging thought into something more positive and loving. It will feel like a total LIE in the beginning as you try replacing the negative thought with the more kind one.

But over time, as you get in the habit of checking your perfectionista, the less you will find she talks to you. 

What Stories Will Your Little Old Lady Self Tell?

I vividly remember my great Aunt Ronnie's stories. The long talks I had with her as an adult, realizing the youth behind the sweet wrinkled face of the 92-year-old woman who had sat in front of me. Getting to know the treasured times of her life that she carried so fondly in her heart remind me today to hold on tightly to my own happy memories.

That time I was with my husband in Kefalonia, Greece sitting on the shore of a beach fit perfectly for two where we felt completely removed from the world.
 
That time I was a freshman in college, laying on the bed I had just made, resting my head on the pillow that night, and knowing with profound gratitude that I was exactly where I was supposed to be.
 
That time I looked out at a sea of smiles where my favorite people danced and celebrated together, all in one place, on my wedding day.
  
All was well. Things were just peacefully so.
 
These times are among my happiest. They are the stories I relive in my mind when I need them most. Some are big, magical moments and others are small, simple ones.

What are your happy moments? What are the stories your sweet old lady self will revel in someday? Travel back in time where you felt more alive than ever before and capture it in your mind as you would with a camera.  
 
Then try it again. Keep on adding your favorite moments until you have a mini-collection. Access the greatest times of your life when you need them. They are there just for you, so take advantage of them, love.
 
Bonus points, always, for repeating often.